The Simple Truth That Changed How I Spoke

Gertrude Deal
Sep 29
3 min read

For years, I believed that showing up meant speaking up. If I was in a meeting, I felt this pressure to contribute—to fill the silence, to agree with the prevailing idea, or just to make sure my voice was heard. The result? A lot of noise, and not always a lot of impact.

Then, early in my career, I had a fantastic mentor who also happened to be my boss. She was one of those people whose contributions were always sharp, insightful, and memorable. She didn't pontificate and she certainly didn't speak just for the sake of it.

One day, while we were sitting together on a plane, headed to Boston, MA, I asked her for advice on how to be taken more seriously in high-stakes meetings. Her response was one of the most simple and profound pieces of guidance I’ve ever received:

"Speak to add Value."

That's it. Just four words. But they completely changed my approach to communication.

The Shift from "Contributing" to "Valuing"

Before this advice, my internal dialogue was: "What should I say here?" or "I need to make sure they know I'm paying attention."

Afterward, my internal dialogue became:

"Do I have a question that will clarify the next steps?"
"Do I have a unique perspective or a piece of data that the group hasn't considered yet?"
"Can I summarize the complex points into a clear path forward?"

The difference is crucial. When you shift your focus from simply contributing to actively adding value, you start to view silence differently. Silence is no longer an opportunity to prove you're present; it's an opportunity to listen and prepare a meaningful intervention.

How to "Speak to Add Value" in Practice

This advice isn't about being quiet; it's about being strategic. Here are three ways you can practice this in your own meetings and conversations:

1. Be a Clarifier and a Synthesizer

Instead of offering a new, half-baked idea, wait for the conversation to get complex and then step in to make it simple. Say something like, “To make sure we’re all aligned, it sounds like our two main options are A (which gets us X result) and B (which gets us Y result). Is that a fair summary?” This is high-value work because it brings focus and efficiency to the group.

2. Offer the “Missing Piece”

Before you speak, quickly audit what's already been said. If everyone is focused on the product and no one has mentioned the budget or the client timeline, that’s your opening. You're not repeating; you're introducing a necessary, missing dimension. Your contribution moves the decision-making process forward.

3. Ask the Incisive Question

Sometimes, the highest-value contribution is a question, not a statement. If a decision is about to be made and you have a lingering doubt, ask the question that pierces the core assumption: "Before we finalize this, can we talk about the one scenario where this might fail, and how we'd recover?" This shows critical thinking and foresight.

The beauty of "Speak to add Value" is that it’s permission to be quiet. It frees you from the pressure of always having the answer. When you finally do speak, your voice will carry more weight because everyone knows you aren’t just talking—you're providing something essential.

Your Mentoring Monday Challenge: In your next few meetings, actively count how many times you spoke. Then, ask yourself for each instance: Did this genuinely add value, or was it just noise? I guarantee this exercise will refine your professional voice faster than any communication course.

In Motivation,